Courtship

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Courtship is an appointment between a male and a female who agrees to spend a segment of time together for the purpose of getting better acquainted before getting married. It is a period of attraction for deeper relationship. This period is called the romantic stage. In this stage, do not have to work on the relation; they want to make each other happy always and they often do. The average life span of this initial stage of romantic love is two years.

Courtship is all about been ready for it. Yes, different people have different opinion about appropriate time or stage before engaging in courtship: age is just in number: it takes maturity and trust to want to commit your life to someone else. Before taking the step forward into courtship, it is best to have reached a minimum in both personal development and economic prosperity as well as in one’s own professional preparation.

Courtship should last a reasonable time: it should be neither too short nor too long. Early courtship will enable them grow up together instead of joining together when the foundation of their attitude and habit have been laid separately. Although it is faced with risks of lack of emotional maturity, lack of economic means, parental opposition and risk of not really been in love and conflict.

Later, a mature person has more experience in human relationship and greater economic control than young people; able to discern love from romantic fantasy.

I believe that developing a healthy courtship can be good preparation for healthy marriage. I am not suggesting that all courtship leads healthy marriage or that such person’s end up marrying each other. I only suggest that such relationship will enable them answer the questions “to marry or not marry”.

Courtship should be based on moral principles and not on sexual relationship. Sexual addiction is not a foundation upon which marriage should be built.

It is therefore expected from parties involved in courtship to have the understanding that healthy relationship is focused on knowing each other. This is what serious courtship is all about. The human psyche is a complex combination of heredity and environment. It requires a high level of discipline.

The practice of courtship today is far from what is expected of courtship. The young ones have proof for everything. The current phenomenon of ‘hooking up’ in which parties have sex on the first date and their relationship is focused on the sexual experience, fails to qualify either as courtship or a relationship. The misguide emphasis on sex has made it difficult for any parties to have a balanced courtship. Be guided by the precepts of courtship.